Chapter 1

"Mrs. Ford attempted suicide!"

I woke up to a blinding white light. Before I could even register anything, a searing pain shot through my wrist.

Just as I started coming back to my senses, I heard a man speaking with urgency beside me. Then, I saw the man speaking into a phone with his back to me.

"Mrs. Ford is in the hospital now, Mr. Ford. Would you like to come over to check on her?"

A cold voice came through the phone. "Is she dead yet? If she isn't, then stop bothering me!"

The call was then promptly ended, and the man in the room heaved a heavy sigh. He was startled when he turned around.

Moments later, he walked up to me and said, "You're awake, Mrs. Ford?"

"Mrs. Ford…?" I stared at him in confusion. "Are you talking to me?"

"Don't you recognize me?"

The man's expression shifted slightly before he continued, "I'm Bob. Bob Bilber, Mr. Ford's assistant."

"And… Who's Mr. Ford?"

Bob looked at me with a frown, starting to look annoyed. "Mr. Ford is very busy with work, Mrs. Ford. If your suicide attempt didn't work, surely a bout of amnesia wouldn't do the trick either! Just give up already! Mr. Ford isn't coming to see you!"

That only confused me more. I had no idea what Bob was going on about.

When he saw me keeping quiet, he took a step forward and said earnestly, "Mrs. Ford, you've been married to Mr. Ford for five years, and you've been making a scene the entire time. Yet you haven't gotten Mr. Ford to love you despite all that.

"Isn't it time you took a step back and reflect on everything that you've done? Stop causing him trouble!"

I still had no idea what was going on, but Bob's attitude made me feel uncomfortable. The way he was behaving, especially, sparked an unexplainable sense of aversion in me.

Hang on…

"Did you just say… five years?"

I rushed into the hospital room's bathroom and stared into the mirror. I was still me. I didn't look much different from how I remembered, except that I looked more mature—and there was a hint of sorrow that lingered, no matter how long I stared at my reflection.

Could everything Bob said be true? Was it really five years down the road now? Was I really married?

…

As it turned out, I was really married. And I'd been married for the past five years, in fact.

It wasn't time travel, nor was it a dream. It was amnesia. My current memory was still stuck at the point when I was 18.

That was when I first entered college. Back then, I had a crush on a senior named Jonathan Ford. He was the perfect man—handsome, capable, and from a prestigious family. To me, he was nothing short of perfection. And now, I was married to him.

According to Bob, I was 20 when I married Jonathan. It was a flash marriage, and we barely had a chance to get to know each other. Since I hadn't graduated from college at the time, we only registered our marriage and didn't have a wedding.

After we got married, I learned that Jonathan's heart was never mine. Instead, he was on close terms with his childhood friend, Alicia Zimmer. Rumor had it that she was the one who got away.

As for me, the unloved one, I began acting out within our marriage. I used every kind of absurd method to get Jonathan's attention, but I only succeeded in making him increasingly resent me. His friends saw me as a joke, counting down the days to when we'd eventually get a divorce.

Alicia had never paid me any mind. She was the center of attention in their social circle, and every time I acted out or caused a scene, all of them just saw me as a joke.

In the end, I threatened to take my own life to make Jonathan break off all contact with Alicia. However, he refused. Instead, he told me to go to hell. So, I tried to end my life, and that was everything that happened before I woke up.

I found it all so surreal. Committing suicide for love sounded like something I'd never do!

By the time I pieced all the information together, I was already back in the master bedroom of our marital home.

The doctor said I was fine, so Bob simply sent me straight back. Before he left, he gave what sounded both like advice and a warning to not cause any more trouble.

Staring at the enormous villa before me, I lost any desire to throw a tantrum. I was stunned by the overwhelming wealth before my eyes. Just the walk-in closet alone was bigger than my old apartment!

As I stood there, wide-eyed, taking in the luxurious bedroom I shared with Jonathan, I suddenly heard movement at the door. I whipped around and met Jonathan's eyes. The expression on his face was cold and dark.

Chapter 2

I knew that I'd been married to Jonathan for five years, but as far as I could remember, this was the first time I was seeing his face up close like this.

I had to admit, there was a reason I had such a crush on him in my youth. Just seeing his face was enough to lift my mood considerably. Despite that cold expression of his, I couldn't find it in me to despise him.

When he saw me keeping quiet, he frowned and said, "Stop making a scene, Elise."

As he spoke, he made his way toward the walk-in closet. He didn't even pause when passing by me and casually picked out a robe.

I turned and looked at him. "Making a scene?"

I hadn't said a word since the moment he came back, and he said I was making a scene?

Jonathan looked over at me with a dark gaze and said, "Didn't you always throw yourself at me whenever I came home? What? Are you changing your tactics now?"

I was a bit surprised. Was I really that bold after we got married? But I kept a calm expression and replied nonchalantly, "Oh, that won't happen again in the future."

I had expected Jonathan to be relieved. But instead, his frown deepened, and his gaze on me got increasingly impatient. "I'm really tired because of work lately. I haven't got the time to deal with your tricks."

That left me stumped for words.

His gaze grew cold when he failed to get a response from me. He continued, "Don't try to mess with Alicia again, Elise. She's done nothing wrong. So, even if you threaten me with your life, it would change absolutely nothing at all."

I was stunned, and I felt a mix of emotions within me. Bob had told me pretty much everything there was to know about things between Jonathan and me.

The gist of it was that I loved Jonathan, but Jonathan loved Alicia. So I, as the clown in this crowded relationship, kept causing trouble for Alicia, resulting in Jonathan getting really fed up with me.

The reason behind my suicide attempt was also due to my jealousy of Jonathan's attentiveness to Alicia. Hence, I secretly caused trouble for Alicia's company and slandered her artists.

But Jonathan had chosen to back her up without the slightest hesitation. This was essentially telling everyone that I, his lawfully wedded wife, was just his wife in name, and was nothing compared to Alicia.

That was such a huge blow to me that I attempted suicide to win him back.

Clearly, that didn't work. A man who was already so annoyed by me wouldn't feel any pity for me, even after a suicide attempt. He'd only see me as a nuisance.

He lost patience and disappeared into the bathroom after another stretch of silence from me.

I let out a sigh of relief and flopped down onto the large bed, my mind in chaos. Having lost all memory of the past few years, I truly didn't understand how I had become such a person.

At 18, I had always scorned those who lost themselves in love. Yet here I was—dying for a man. I honestly never thought that I'd end up in such a state.

My thoughts were all over the place. I hadn't even figured out what I was going to do next when I felt the quilt being lifted. A tall, muscular figure lay down beside me.

The sudden heat startled me, and I turned my head, only to meet Jonathan's deep, dark eyes. Still as cold and indifferent as ever, they now had a touch of suppressed intensity within them.

I stuttered, "I… What… What are you doing?"

Though I'd lost my memory, based on all the information that I had, I'd deduced that my relationship with Jonathan was supposed to be terrible. It was likely that we'd even been sleeping in separate beds. So, why did he just make himself comfortable in my bed like it was completely natural?

Jonathan acted as though he didn't see my panic. In one swift motion, he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his embrace.

Without saying a word, he pressed me down on the bed. His calloused fingers moved over me with practiced ease, and an unfamiliar sensation surged through me.

"Jonathan Ford!" I couldn't hold it back and called out his name. "Stop touching me!"

Chapter 3

For a moment, Jonathan seemed surprised by how genuine the refusal in my eyes looked. But that was soon replaced by impatience. "Stop kicking up a fuss, Elise."

I hated the tone he always took on whenever he spoke to me. Even the face I had secretly admired for years was starting to lose its charm.

"I'm your wife, aren't I? I got admitted to the hospital for attempting suicide, and you didn't even bother to show any concern. And what's more, you're now speaking to me in such an aggressive and accusatory manner. What right have you got to walk all over me like this, Jonathan Ford?"

My anger seemed to light his fuse as well. He gripped my wrist tight and spat coldly, "You brought all this on yourself."

His grip was strong, and unfortunately, right over the spot where my wound was. I winced involuntarily, but I forced myself not to cry out. Tears welled in my eyes, and in his gaze, I saw just how pathetic I must have looked. I held back my tears by a thread.

Then Jonathan suddenly let go, turned me over, and pulled me into his arms from behind. His voice remained cold. "I'll let things go this time. But never fake a suicide to manipulate me again."

I struggled, but Jonathan only held me tighter, making it clear he wouldn't let me talk back. The disparity in strength between us was too huge, and after several futile attempts to free myself, I discovered that no amount of squirming would do me any good. So, I gave up.

When I woke up the next morning, Jonathan was no longer beside me. I casually threw on some clothes and made my way downstairs, only to see him already having breakfast at the dining table.

The butler, Hugh Stark, greeted me. "Good morning, Ms. Sawyer."

I stood there unmoving. Jonathan didn't even look up. "Come over and have breakfast."

It was just breakfast, but the huge spread left me stunned. I couldn't help wondering if all wealthy families had such grand breakfasts.

I sat across from Jonathan, and Hugh served me a bowl of oatmeal. The scent of mango hit me immediately, and I frowned. "Why is there mango in this?"

Hugh answered, "Ms. Alicia sent them over specially. Mangoes are her favorite, and she had them flown in from Eulariop…"

I lost my appetite in an instant. "I'm not eating."

The sound of silverware clinking against porcelain rang through the room. Jonathan finally looked up at me and said, "Don't push it, Elise."

Anger burned within me. "Does it bother you that I'm not eating mangoes now?"

"You're not eating them just because they were sent over by Alicia, aren't you?" Jonathan's expression was frosty. "When will you stop being so jealous, Elise?"

Me? Jealous of Alicia? I didn't know how Jonathan viewed me at 25. Perhaps he saw me as petty and pathetic. But regardless, I was still his wife. How could he not know that I was allergic to mangoes?

Just as I was about to speak up, Hugh announced, "Ms. Alicia is here, sir!"

A gentle voice followed. "Am I intruding on anything, Jon?"

A slender figure walked in from the door.

All the household staff, including Hugh, greeted her with such familiarity that made it clear she was a regular guest.

It took all but one look for me to know that this was Alicia Zimmer.

I also noticed how Hugh addressed us. I was Jonathan's legally wedded wife, and yet he addressed me as "Ms. Sawyer". But he addressed her as "Ms. Alicia". It was clear who he was on closer terms with.

It was no wonder I had such strong feelings against Alicia at 25 years old. I was Jonathan's legal wife, but I could never compare to the open favoritism he showed another woman—all under the pretense of being childhood friends. Anyone would break down under that.

Alicia looked at me with feigned concern. "Ms. Sawyer, I heard that you… cut yourself. Are you alright now?"

I simply scoffed, not bothering to give her a decent reply.

Chapter 4

I didn't know how Jonathan and Alicia perceived me at 25. Perhaps I was a coward to them, or perhaps I was a pushover because of how much I loved Jonathan. But now, I was back to the person I had been at 18. I didn't love Jonathan at all, so I had no reason to let them trample all over me.

Alicia looked at Jonathan like she was in a difficult position. "I'm sorry, Jon, but it seems like Ms. Sawyer doesn't welcome me here. Perhaps I shouldn't have come…"

"You knew that and came anyway?" I asked, cutting straight to the point. "Are you here to make a joke of me?"

Alicia's face flushed red instantly, and Jonathan snapped coldly at me, "Stop being unreasonable, Elise!"

I grew irritated at how he stepped in to defend Alicia, and my impression of him worsened once more.

Waking up married to my former crush had initially felt exciting and surreal. But now, it seemed to me that Jonathan really wasn't all that.

So what if he was rich and handsome? Did he think that treating his wife like trash made him look good? If he really was so high and mighty, he shouldn't have married me in the first place!

I was fuming with resentment while Alicia remained soft and graceful. "Jon, I came by today to personally invite you to my celebration party…"

Then, as though only just registering that I was standing right beside them and that it wouldn't be proper not to extend me an invitation, she said, "Ms. Sawyer, would you care to join us?"

I originally had no intention of going. But when I saw the subtle disdain and provocation in her eyes, I suddenly smiled and said, "Sure! After all, I'm Jonathan's wife. I should accompany him to public events."

And so, I ended up tagging along with Jonathan to Alicia's celebration party. Everyone in the private room looked over collectively when the three of us showed up together. Their expressions were colorful, to say the least.

"Why did Jonathan bring her?"

"It's no surprise at all. His wife is always acting up and treating every woman around Jonathan with hostility, let alone Alicia!"

"I heard she even tried to take her own life because of what happened with Alicia!"

"Exactly! But she should know her place. Marrying Jonathan was already way out of her league. What right does she have to control him? Those other women were one thing—but Alicia? She can't even compare!"

Their voices weren't exactly loud, but they were just loud enough that I could hear them. I glanced over at them and reached the assumption that they were most likely Jonathan's or Alicia's friends. Either way, they were no doubt from the same social circle.

I scoffed inwardly. No wonder the 25-year-old me tried to kill herself. How could one not get twisted thoughts hearing such demeaning comments every day?

Besides, I must have really loved Jonathan a lot at the time. Why else would I have been driven to the point of ending my own life under such constant torment?

Jonathan and Alicia were already seated at seats reserved for them, leaving me standing there by myself.

"Doesn't she feel awkward just standing there alone?"

"Why would she? She'd agree to anything, even if you made her grovel, as long as she can be by Jonathan's side!"

I looked over coldly at those gossiping men and said, "Who is he to me? Why would I grovel?"

Their expressions changed, clearly not expecting a retaliation from me.

Jonathan's expression grew annoyed. "Alright, that's enough. Stop making a scene."

I'd been publicly mocked, but not only did he not take my side, he gave such a nonchalant comment. I let out a bitter laugh.

"Seems like I'm not welcome here. I won't intrude any further, then."

With that, I turned and walked out of the room.

I heard gasps from behind me.

"Am I mistaken? Did she actually give Jonathan an attitude?"

"Has she finally lost her mind from all the jealousy?"

"I bet she won't last 30 minutes. She'll come crawling back soon enough…"

Chapter 5

"Elise might do it, even if Jonathan made her grovel and apologize to Alicia, don't you think?"

I remained silent and said not a word.

They were all mocking me, betting that I wouldn't really give Jonathan an attitude.

All the chatter from them grated on my nerves, and I scoffed before walking away without looking back. Only then did the voices behind me finally die down, perhaps in disbelief at my sudden departure.

I wondered how they'd react if they knew that I had intentions of divorcing Jonathan.

I went out to the pool in the hopes that some fresh air might help clear my mind.

But shortly after, Alicia appeared. "Ms. Sawyer, I must say—I see you in a new light today."

I glanced behind her and saw that she had come out alone, so I replied mockingly, "You know how much I hate you. Aren't you afraid I might just push you into the pool right now?"

Alicia smiled. "I was worried you wouldn't dare to. After all, we all know that Jon will save me first."

I pursed my lips, not bothering to reply.

Then, she walked up to me and taunted, "Want to make a bet, Elise?"

I found it absurd. "If the two of you are really so in love with each other, why won't you just get Jonathan to divorce me? Do you feel more in love, trampling all over another person's feelings and putting on a tragic show, Alicia?"

Her expression darkened. "That's all because you wouldn't let go of him! You were shameless enough to attempt suicide just to cling to him! What he has for you is nothing but pity!"

Then, she swiftly resumed her calm and gentle demeanor and asked me again, "Want to make a bet, Elise?"

Light reflected off the ripples on the surface of the pool. It looked clear, yet deceptively deep.

I shook my head without hesitation. "No."

I couldn't swim.

My hasty answer seemed to have caught Alicia off guard.

Besides, even if I could swim, why would I risk my life just to test whether a man loves me or another woman more? Attempting an act as foolish as suicide once was more than enough. I would never do it a second time.

Just as I stood up, I caught the malicious glint in Alicia's eyes. She stood behind me, and as I was about to leave, she shoved me hard. I fell into the water with a loud splash.

Shrieks erupted around me as I hit the water. I began sinking fast, and at that moment, I felt nothing but an all-consuming fear of drowning.

Water started getting into my throat, and my lungs began to burn. I struggled with all my might to swim upward, only to see a familiar figure swimming quickly in another direction.

My husband, Jonathan, chose to save Alicia when both of us fell into the pool.

A sharp pain shot through my chest. Perhaps that was the last fragment of my emotions from my 25-year-old self.

Though I'd forgotten about the past and no longer loved him, my body remembered. However, even that last remaining feeling I had for him was completely drowned this time.

…

When I came to, I was lying at the edge of the pool.

Both Alicia and I had been rescued. However, she was rescued by Jonathan, while I was rescued by a stranger. He was a rather handsome man.

As I lay on the ground, he was pressing his palms against my chest, trying to force out the water I'd swallowed. With a sputter, I coughed out a mouthful of water.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jonathan approaching.

Alicia sat there hugging her knees to her chest, looking pitiful and delicate, gazing longingly at Jonathan's back.

Jonathan seemed to have just remembered that he had a wife. He asked with a frown, "Are you alright?"

I didn't give him an answer and scrambled to get to my feet.

The man beside me tried to help me up, but I pushed him away. When Jonathan finally stood before me, I raised my hand and slapped him across the face hard.

Silence fell. The place became so quiet that I could hear everyone's breath slow to a hush.

"Let's get a divorce, Jonathan."

After a long pause, I heard my voice cutting through the silence. "Consider that slap your alimony to your ex-wife."