Chapter 1

The phone buzzed on the counter, and without looking, I knew it was him. Alex. He always called at the oddest hours.

“Lauren,” his voice came through the line, casual and warm, as if he didn’t hold the power to shatter my world. “I need to tell you something.”

I leaned against the kitchen counter, twisting a dish towel in my hands. “Hey, Alex. What’s up?”

There was a pause. That slight hesitation from him. It wasn’t like him.

“I’m engaged,” he said, just like that. No preamble. No buildup. Just the words, sharp and clean like a blade.

The towel slipped from my fingers and hit the floor. I gripped the edge of the counter as if it might stop me from crumbling. “What?”

“Yeah,” he said, his voice carrying an odd mix of excitement and nerves. “Her name’s Sophia. I think you’ll really like her. She’s amazing.”

Amazing.

My head spun. I opened my mouth, but no sound came out.

“You okay?” he asked, his tone softening.

“Yeah,” I lied, swallowing hard. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just… wow. That’s big news.”

“I wanted you to hear it from me,” he said, as if that made it better. “We’re throwing an engagement party next weekend. I’d love for you to come. It wouldn’t feel right without you there.”

Right. Because nothing screams comfort like watching the man you love celebrate his future with someone else.

“Of course,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. “I wouldn’t miss it.”

“Great. I’ll send you the details.” He paused, then added, “It really means a lot to me, Lauren. You’ve been such a big part of my life. I couldn’t imagine doing this without you.”

“Yeah,” I murmured, clutching the counter harder to steady myself. “I’ll see you there.”

The line went dead, and for a moment, so did I.

___________

The first time I met Alex, I was five years old. My mom had just brought over a plate of brownies to welcome the new neighbors, and I tagged along, clinging to her hand.

Alex opened the door, all gangly limbs and a crooked grin. He was twelve, which to my five-year-old self might as well have been thirty.

“Hi,” he said, looking down at me. “What’s your name?”

“Lauren,” I said shyly.

“Cool name,” he replied, ruffling my hair. “I’m Alex. You like bikes?”

And just like that, he became my favorite person in the world.

He taught me how to ride my first bike. His hands steadied the seat as I pedaled wobbly circles around the cul-de-sac. He never laughed when I fell, just dusted me off and encouraged me to try again.

By the time I was seven, I was following him around like a shadow. He let me tag along on adventures with his friends, even when they teased him about it. “She’s my sidekick,” he’d say with a grin, pulling me along to the next escapade.

_________

The memories flooded back as I sank onto the couch, the phone still clutched in my hand.

I could see it so clearly—the two of us riding bikes through the neighborhood, playing hide-and-seek in the woods, and staying up late talking about everything and nothing.

He was my best friend, my protector, my first love.

And he had no idea.

“I’m engaged.” The words replayed in my mind, louder and more painful each time.

I tried to imagine him with Sophia—holding her hand, laughing at her jokes, looking at her the way I always wished he’d look at me.

It hurt.

It hurt more than I thought it would.

Later that night, I sat alone in the dark, replaying Alex’s words over and over in my head.

“I’m engaged.”

I thought about all the times I almost told him how I felt. The late-night phone calls, the stolen glances, the moments when the words sat on the tip of my tongue but never made it out.

“Lauren, you’re my best friend,” he’d said once, after I’d helped him through a rough breakup. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

I’d smiled and nodded, hiding the sting behind a mask of indifference.

But now, as I sat there alone, the mask cracked.

I thought back to my seventeenth birthday, when he’d surprised me with tickets to see my favorite band. We’d spent the entire night singing along, laughing until our voices were hoarse. On the way home, he’d turned to me and said, “You make everything better, Lauren. I hope you know that.”

I’d wanted so badly to tell him that he made everything better for me, too. That my heart raced every time he looked at me, that I stayed awake at night replaying every moment we spent together.

But I didn’t.

I convinced myself it wasn’t the right time, that there’d be a better moment to tell him how I felt.

Now, that moment would never come.

The glow of my phone caught my eye, and I picked it up to see a text from Alex.

“I’m so glad we talked today. You’re the best, Lauren. Don’t ever forget that.”

I stared at the screen, the words blurring as tears filled my eyes.

What did he expect me to say? That I was thrilled for him? That I couldn’t wait to watch him marry someone else while I sat on the sidelines, pretending to be happy?

I dropped the phone onto the coffee table and buried my face in my hands.

“What about me, Alex?” I whispered into the silence. “What am I supposed to do without you?”

The next morning, I woke to sunlight streaming through the blinds and a dull ache in my chest. I stared at the ceiling, trying to summon the energy to face the day.

My phone buzzed again, and for a moment, I considered ignoring it. But curiosity won out, and I reached for it, half-expecting another text from Alex.

It wasn’t.

Instead, it was an invitation to the engagement party, complete with a picture of Alex and Sophia smiling together.

They looked perfect—like they belonged together.

My stomach twisted, and I set the phone down, fighting the urge to throw it across the room.

This was my reality now. Alex was getting married, and I had to figure out how to live with it.

I thought back to the times he’d been there for me—when my dog died, when I didn’t get into my first-choice college, when I thought I’d failed at life. Alex had always been my anchor, the one person I could count on no matter what.

But now, I had to learn how to stand on my own.

I had to let him go.

The thought made my chest tighten, but deep down, I knew it was the only way forward.

“I’m happy for you, Alex,” I whispered into the empty room, even though it wasn’t true. “I just wish I could be happy for me, too.”

Chapter 2

The chatter of voices and the clinking of glasses buzzed in my ears as I stepped into the packed venue. It was exactly the kind of place Alex loved—charming, elegant, and just a little pretentious.

The kind of place where I felt completely out of place.

I smoothed the fabric of my navy dress and inhaled deeply, trying to steel myself for what was ahead. My fingers fidgeted with the small clutch in my hand, and I scanned the room, avoiding eye contact.

And then I saw him.

Alex stood near the bar, laughing at something someone had said, his smile as warm and familiar as ever. For a moment, it was like nothing had changed.

Until I saw her.

Sophia.

She stood next to him, her hand resting lightly on his arm. She was even more beautiful in person, with perfectly styled waves cascading over her shoulders and a dress that probably cost more than my monthly rent. Her posture was effortless, her presence magnetic.

My breath caught in my throat.

“Lauren!” Alex’s voice cut through the noise as he spotted me. His face lit up, and he started toward me, Sophia in tow.

I froze, every instinct telling me to turn and run. But my feet stayed rooted in place, betraying me.

“Hey,” Alex said, pulling me into a quick hug. He smelled like the cologne I’d bought him for his birthday last year.

“Hi,” I managed, my throat tight.

He stepped back, motioning to Sophia. “This is Sophia. Sophia, this is Lauren, my best friend.”

Best friend. The words hit like a slap.

Sophia extended a hand, her smile polite but distant. “It’s so nice to meet you. Alex has told me so much about you.”

“All good things, I hope,” I said, forcing a smile as I shook her hand.

“Of course,” she replied, her tone smooth.

“Lauren’s basically family,” Alex added, and my stomach twisted.

“Family,” Sophia echoed, glancing between us. There was something in her eyes—curiosity? Suspicion? I couldn’t tell.

“I’ll grab us some drinks,” Alex said, oblivious to the tension. He disappeared toward the bar, leaving Sophia and me alone.

“So,” she began, her gaze flicking over me. “How long have you known Alex?”

“Since I was five,” I said, my voice steadier than I expected.

Her smile tightened. “Wow. That’s a long time.”

“Yeah,” I said, trying not to sound defensive. “He’s been like a brother to me.”

The lie tasted bitter on my tongue, but it seemed to satisfy her.

“Well, I’m glad you could make it,” she said after a pause. “Alex really wanted you here. He talks about you a lot.”

I forced another smile. “He talks about you a lot too.”

Her expression softened slightly, but I couldn’t tell if it was genuine or calculated. Before I could decipher it, Alex returned with drinks in hand, his energy filling the space between us.

“Cheers,” he said, handing me a glass.

I clinked it against his, the sound echoing louder than I’d expected.

The night dragged on.

I pasted on a smile, engaged in small talk with strangers, and avoided Alex and Sophia as much as possible. My feet ached from the heels I’d forced myself into, and the wine in my glass tasted sour.

Every time I looked up, I caught glimpses of Alex and Sophia together—laughing, leaning into each other, looking so much like a couple in love.

The pit in my stomach grew heavier with each passing minute.

I was lingering near the dessert table when the inevitable happened.

“Hey,” Alex said, appearing beside me. His smile was easy, familiar, but I couldn’t bring myself to return it.

“You’ve been quiet tonight,” he observed, tilting his head.

I shrugged, popping a mini tart into my mouth to avoid answering.

“You okay?” he pressed.

I swallowed, my throat dry. “Yeah. It’s just… a lot of people. You know I’m not great with crowds.”

He chuckled. “You used to be fine when it was just the two of us sneaking into parties.”

“That was different,” I said, my tone sharper than I intended.

His smile faltered. “Lauren—”

“Alex, there you are!” Sophia’s voice cut in as she appeared beside him, her arm looping through his.

“Hi again,” she said, her gaze flicking to me.

I smiled tightly. “Hi.”

“We’re about to do the toast,” she said to Alex, leaning into him. “Come on.”

“I’ll be right there,” he said softly, brushing a hand over hers.

Her smile froze for a second, then she nodded and walked away, leaving us alone again.

Alex turned back to me, his expression unreadable. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” I said, my voice light. “This is your big night.”

He studied me for a long moment, his eyes searching mine.

“Alright,” he said finally. “Come join the toast, okay?”

I nodded, watching him walk away.

The toast was unbearable.

Alex stood at the center of the room, his arm around Sophia as he spoke about love and new beginnings. His words were warm, sincere, and every one of them felt like a dagger to my chest.

“To Alex and Sophia!” someone shouted, and the crowd cheered, raising their glasses.

I clinked mine half-heartedly with a stranger, downing the champagne in one gulp.

I needed air.

The balcony was blissfully quiet, the cool night air a welcome contrast to the stifling atmosphere inside.

I gripped the railing, staring out at the city lights, trying to steady my breathing.

“Thought I’d find you here.”

His voice sent a shiver down my spine.

I turned to see Alex stepping out, his tie loosened and his hands in his pockets.

“Shouldn’t you be inside with your fiancée?” I said, my voice sharper than I intended.

He winced. “She’s mingling. I wanted to check on you.”

I forced a smile. “I’m fine, Alex. Really.”

“You don’t seem fine,” he said, stepping closer.

I looked away, my hands tightening on the railing. “It’s your engagement party, Alex. Can we not do this right now?”

“Do what?”

“This.” I gestured between us. “Whatever this is.”

He frowned, leaning on the railing beside me. “Lauren, you’re my best friend. If something’s bothering you, I want to know.”

Best friend. There it was again, the title that felt like both a gift and a curse.

“I’m happy for you, Alex,” I said, my voice breaking slightly.

“Are you?”

The question hung in the air, heavy and unspoken.

“Of course I am,” I said, forcing a smile. “You deserve to be happy.”

His eyes lingered on mine, filled with something I couldn’t name. Guilt? Regret? I didn’t want to know.

Before he could say anything else, the balcony door opened, and Sophia stepped out.

“Alex, there you are,” she said, her smile tight.

He straightened, stepping back from me. “Just getting some air.”

She glanced at me, her expression unreadable. “Everyone’s asking for you.”

“Coming,” he said, his voice soft.

As they walked away, Alex glanced back at me, his eyes filled with something I couldn’t quite place.

I turned back to the railing, tears stinging my eyes.

For a moment, I let myself imagine what it would feel like if things were different.

If he had looked at me the way he looked at her.

If he had chosen me.